I don't know what triggers it.
But suddenly, it's just so darn hard to get anything done. Should I do this? or that? Should I buy "transitional" produce? Or certified organic? Did it come from a small farm? Should I walk to the store? Drive my cool car? If I wait a bit, will these shoes go on sale? Were they made by slave labor? If I say yes to working with this client, will I have to say no to some other client? Who shall I say no to? Are there any electricity capacity warnings? If I wash clothes tonight, will tomorrow be clear and windy so I can dry clothes on the line? Do I have the time to do that? Should I just dry them in the dryer? Did any rain forest species go extinct so I could buy coffee today? Where did all the crickets go?
Why hasn't so-and-so called me back about the sustainability project? How much energy really goes in to making a gallon of ice cream? Should I stop eating chocolate now, or wait until the seed fungus finally destroys all the cocao trees? Can I fight against the developer-driven multiplex? Can I find time to love my children? Will my wife ever stop working so frenetically that we can spend some quality time together, possibly even daily? Will global warming raise the ocean enough that we have to build a dam and pumping station across the Golden Gate to keep salt water from flooding the Sacramento Delta?
Where will I find the strength to carry on?
When I finally get to that question, a quiet Voice will speak in my heart: "I have strength enough."
Peace begins to flow. "Yeah, but..." I usually protest--
"Listen: there is no 'but.' Just live. Live joyfully. Do the next thing, and just the next thing. I will always be here to show you what that next thing is, and I will always be your strength so you may accomplish it. Continue to be alert to my calling. It is all going just fine."
Thanks, God. I accept the gifts of your love and action in my life.